“Failing organizations are usually over-managed and under led.”- Stephen Covey***
Stella
Stella was a tough example of a woman. She ran her household, in spite of her husband and unfortunately, she ran him too. If you asked her husband, John about being involved in something or simply being present at an event, he’d say, he had to check with Stella first, because it would depend on if she had other plans for him. He might shrug his shoulders and say something that indicated his desire not to anger her. He was clearly intimidated by his wife. Is this leadership?
Jared
Jared was the director of a key department in a large organization. His staff consisted of a supervisor, department secretary and other professional staff in the department. He rarely participated in any negative employment issues within the department but made sure he was present when there was a positive message to share. The negative situations would usually be handled by the supervisor. She was competent enough. On occasion, Jared would make decisions that affected the staff and he would communicate it to the employees directly involved. He or one of these employees would inform the supervisor later, as an apparent afterthought. When the staff actually saw him, he was walking through the hall and would share words of wisdom or wit. He otherwise stayed in his office with the door closed or was away at meetings. He thought of himself as a great example of nurturing leadership. Was he nurturing?
Julie
Julie was an awesome, talented individual who was known and touted as a multi-talented, jack of all trades. Whatever she set her mind to doing she was known for getting it done. She would receive glowing feedback from those for whom she performed work and managed projects. Because she managed tasks and projects so well and got along with others so successfully, she was often eyed for lead roles on the job and in church. Her custom was usually to take charge and get the job done. She loved having others depend on her and she loved the attention she received in doing so. Though she might at times have a team of individuals she had recruited or had been given, to help her with assigned projects, she usually did most of the work herself. In Julie’s mind it was easier just to do it than to teach others and wait until they were up to speed with their newly acquired skills. She would have others on the team prepared to help out if and when necessary but for the most part, she could manage on her own. Her teams were more like a following. They were there to cheer her on but if you looked close enough, they did little more than grunt work. When accolades were doled out and Julie’s name was the primary name mentioned, it was often the true story behind the project. She did it all singlehandedly. Team members, though initially enthralled by her charm, eventually grew weary when working with Julia because they found themselves doing small tasks with little value…grunt work if you will. No one protested, however, since management loved her so. They figured they would probably live to regret it if they complained about management’s treasured leader. Is she a treasured leader or no?
A woman who rules over her husband with fear and an iron fist; a man who picks and chooses when he wants to lead and when he doesn’t; a woman who impresses everyone with her personality and skills but beneath the wonderment, one finds a lone wolf who doesn’t empower or trust others with the work at hand. Who’s the better leader? Which would you choose to lead in your organization? What do you do with those who are left? What can you do with those who are left?
Real Leadership Explored
There are three fundamentals of leadership that we should see no matter where a person serves in a leadership capacity.
Three Defining Elements of Leadership
1. Influencer – A leader should be skilled in the area of influencing others. An influential leader is able to get others to willingly follow them or comply, without coercion, because they trust their leadership. They also trust that leader will lead and guide them to a desired, effective and beneficial end and that the outcome will lead to success.
2. Motivator – A leader should be one who motivates others to act. A leader who motivates others is first motivated themselves and then knows how to encourage others to become their best and perform at their highest level of performance. They make others feel valued, included and worthy of their roles, while also identifying just the right challenges and opportunities to further develop their skills and strengths.
3. Vision Caster – A leader should rally individuals towards a common goal or vision. They help others understand the direction of the team, the organization… see the big picture. They motivate them to visualize the target and the path that leads to the target so they can run towards the vision with as much excitement and anticipation as the one who created it.
The above three elements serve as a foundation for any leadership position – influencing, motivating and casting a big picture vision for others… at home, work, school, church and anywhere else. Without these three elements, one is doomed to fail in a leadership role sooner or later.
Ten Realities of Leadership that Lead to Success
Realistically, a person walks and talks like a leader before they ever become one. Before placing someone in leadership, even if it means for the home, which might mean deciding whether someone is ready for marriage and family, we should see primary characteristics of a leader consistently in operation. Ten indicative signs of a leader are:
1. Humility – humbleness
2. Initiative – the ability to take charge before others do and before being asked
3. Excellence – this is attention to detail not perfection
4. Protector/Provider – one who is compelled to meet the needs of another
5. Progressive – values change and innovation, wants to make a difference
6. Effectual – Capable, successful and yielding a positive impact
7. Altruistic – unselfish concern for others, valuing differences and being inclusive
8. Kindness – friendly, generous and considerate
9. Honesty – values and speaks truth; functions ethically
10. Continuous Learner – always desiring to know more personally and professionally
You might notice that leadership, overall, really appears to be about others as opposed to being about self. When people have the wrong motives for the pursuit of leadership, they typically operate under the mistaken belief that leadership is about gaining power and privilege when in actuality it is about service and support of others. Now if we examine the three scenarios initially provided, which of those might fit the description of a leader based on the three defining elements as well as the ten success yielding realities of leadership listed?
When I look at those three, I see a mix of talents and skills because I know or knew those people. It is easier, however to encapsulate the negatives in their own terms, even though their opposites exist in the previous lists. Eight of the worst leadership traits that one can exhibit in my experience are:
- Narcissism
- Intimidation
- Inflexibility
- Conflict Avoidance
- Unethical Behavior
- Frequent Display of Negative Emotion
- Inability to Conform to the Organizational Culture
- Ineffective Communication Skills
- Tactlessness
The first example, Stella, was guilty of intimidation, inability to conform to a culture, therefore no humility, not a protector, not progressive, not effectual, not altruistic, not kind and not a continuous learner. In the world we live in, men usually take the lead in the home, even if the marriage is a partnership or the woman makes the bulk of the decisions, in public and in private a man (or a woman) should not be stripped of their manhood by being treated as though they are a child who must receive permission from a parent to function. To publically position a spouse in this way is demeaning and undermines their growth, self-esteem and overall success.
Jared was guilty of conflict avoidance and ineffective communication skills. He lacked excellence and was not effectual.
Julie might be considered narcissistic, inflexible and non-conforming to organizational culture. It is difficult to be progressive when one is focusing on self-preservation and individual advancement. Others get left behind, as a result Julie became ineffectual, lacked altruism, was not viewed as genuinely kind nor honest and clearly not a continuous learner. A continuous learner knows the art of leading others and always seeks to do better.
Closing Thoughts
So what are we left with? Jared may be the easiest to help in becoming a better leader. Conflict management and communication skills can be learned. Things could certainly be worse. It boils down to whether or not someone possesses the basic tenets necessary to lead others to successful achievement of a vision. No one is perfect and we can all do better. Jared could still do a good job.
Keeping in mind that we lead people and manage things, Stella and Julie are a bit more concerning. Not only do they lack many of the right skills needed for leadership success but they possess a number of harmful traits that can have a long term impact on other team members, on the image of the organization as well as on the growth and innovation of everyone involved. They could be the beginning of a slow death for any brand, any company or any project. Word of caution: Pay attention to the “Ten Realities of Leadership” and avoid the worst leadership traits. Crossing your fingers or saying a prayer hoping the poor traits won’t negatively impact your mission or vision is like driving down the street with your eyes closed, hoping you won’t hit anyone. The results could be deadly.